Today is a marathon day. But, in the midst of trying to get the cobwebs away from my sleepy brain, the Lord brought me this post. I have never been to this woman's website before, but this post has brought a beautiful thrill to my soul.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
A Touch Crazy?
“I think I am going a touch crazy.”The words catch in my throat somewhere in the midst of scratching casserole remains from the corners of a 9 by 13 pan and monitoring piano practices. Maybe another day I could have found something to feebly chuckle about through the choking words, but today stinging tears of exhaustion and hopelessness blur my vision. From my vantage point at the kitchen sink, it all looks despairingly familiar, a millionth showing of a frame jammed on replay. And at this point in the scene, the script calls for me to sink my head down onto the countertop and have a good cry…or just give up and run away.A few steps from the sink, 6-year-old Levi pounces on the back of growling 4-year-old Kai, the roar and rumble of their wrestle sending wedgits scattering amidst the legos, blocks and tractors. Yet I can hardly move to break up the roiling tangle for the weight wrapping around my feet: baby Shalom clinging to my leg, slapping my hip with her whimpering pleas, “Coat on! Outside! Mammmaaa, coat on!”At the kitchen table, Caleb howls with laughter over his sketched caricature of Joshua, who now fumes retaliation, both negligent of the grammar diagramming lessons at hand. Hope accompanies the entire scene with an appropriate score: gratingly wrong notes of “Morning Has Broken.” “It’s me who is just about broken, somewhere deep inside,” I scoop up wailing Shalom and stumble through the legos to the quiet of our bedroom. “If only I could touch Christ,” the words spill out, “He’d gently smooth out my mothering mess…”
Closing my eyes to the whirl, my mind’s eye makes out the staggering woman tripping, scuffing her knees, the wee pebbles burning along the scrape. I wince: I know the pain of falling. Then she raises a hand, trembling, to make a final lunge for his hem and hope: “If I only touch his garment, I will be made well” (Matt. 9:21).When I am going a touch crazy, can I remember to close my eyes, and stretch out a quavering hand? Relinquishing my slipping grip on a chaotic day, I lunge to touch Christ’s hem, the hem of Him who can restore and renew. “And Jesus perceiving in himself that power had gone out from him, immediately turned about in the crowd and said, “Who touched my garments?” (Mark 5:30). To touch Christ is to touch the power of hope, the power of wholeness, the power of healing.Touch CrossHe to whose hem I cling leads me to the Cross He asks me to embrace. In the vortex of a day spinning out of control, He takes my hand from his hem and calls me to carry a cross. I can hardly stand under the heavy weight of it all, to disciple a half dozen little sinners in the path of Jesus by example…and yet I hear Him whisper to my heart, “For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. You have not yet resisted to the point of shedding blood in your striving against sin” (Heb. 12:3-4).To walk this way of the Cross is to take up the way of mercy and grace. As He pours mercy mingled down upon this head leaning against the foot of the cross, so now He calls me to similarly extend grace in this home to wrestling, teasing boys and their weary mother. When I am going a touch crazy, I must remember to press lips to this Cross, and inhale: receive Christ’s mercy… then exhale: give Christ’s grace. Mercy, grace, mercy, grace.Touching the cross resuscitates me, changing how I breathe, how I live… how I mother.Touch CaveIn the crushing milieu of today, I relish the quiet of this room, this still grotto of calm tucked away. When I’m going a touch crazy, I need to find a cave, enter into the still, and let new life stir. Whether I close my eyes for a moment, or slip into an empty room, I can touch the stillness of the resurrection cave and let the powers of new life heal these wounds, revive me, restore to wholeness. “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me, and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and delivered Himself up for me” (Gal. 2:20).Finding the quiet of Christ’s cave wherever I am is to resurrect from my death in trespasses and sin and to let the life of Christ, pregnant with new, life-giving ways, fill me, grow in me, produce fruit in me.Touch ChildrenTouching Christ, the Cross and the Cave leads me back to the center, where I can smile with Him, “Let the little children come.”Pulling Shalom close, I bury my face in her soft curls. “Let’s go touch all the little children.”I gently lay my hand on the older boys’ shoulders while helping with grammar, softly brush Hope’s hair as she ascends and descends her scales, touch the little boys with smiles and applause as they stack wedgits.Touching Christ, the Cross and the Cave lets me touch children with the Gospel hope of renewal: “Then the one who looked like a man touched me again, and I felt my strength returning” (Dan. 10:18 NLT).As I touch the children, I too feel this strength…hope…returning.Touch CanaI lustily sing in time with Hope’s tinkling of the ivories.As Kai tackles me from behind, I turn with my own fury of tickles, dissolving into a sprawl of laughter, Hope and Levi piling in on our fun. It feels good to laugh, releasing the tight grip of control to touch the joy and celebration of Cana, imbibing deeply of the feast of now.Jesus has come, touching the water of our days and turning it into the sweet wine of delight. As we laugh and touch Cana, Jesus works a miracle in this home, transforming our hopelessness and thirst into a glimpse of the Great joyous Feast to come. Touching Cana makes us laugh with the wonder of it all, this life together, Christ at the center. Somewhere in the midst of scratching casserole remains from the corners of a 9 by 13 pan and monitoring piano practices, I had gone a touch crazy, lost my way, lost touch with the hallowed call to motherhood. In the press of it all, I had forgotten how these intense mothering days are a daily spiritual retreat, Him calling me to come touch that which will direct towards Home.Touching Christ, the Cross, and the cave had drawn me back to touch children with the delightful touch of Cana.The scene was the same, but I could hear a new score playing. Morning had Broken and I’d been restored.Touching the things of Christ has a way of doing that.
(From the archives of CWO) Photo: a sleeping Shalom
Posted by Ann Voskamp @Holy Experience at 4:30 AM
Labels: Children, Homemaking, Homeschooling, Mothering Prayer, Refiner's Fire
Welcome to Days At SpringMeadows!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Monday, July 28, 2008
Some days I post several times and get alot done on the blog, other times it is awhile between posts. This has been one of those times. It seems like at this season finding the time to blog is not easy. Now that S does not do overtime at home during the evenings anymore, I am not on the computer as much at night. And since I have been trying to do Curves at naptime, that takes up 2 or 3 days of the quiet I have during that time. So, I have to catch time here and there to say hello to my family and friends.
We are doing well here. Last week I mentioned I was simplifying clothing. We have ended up getting rid of so much---it feels really good! AND it has really helped make the laundry managable. I went on and did the girls clothes as well. Then S on Saturday cleaned our closet out (while I was gone, he decided to tackle it, WOW!) That was the last area that had not been done since the move. He also got rid of a bunch of his clothes. We then went through shoes, etc. So we have been on a roll! I still have to go through my clothes in the closet. and S and I need to go through our drawers. It feels good though to get this organized before school starts again soon.
I have to tell you about my date night with my husband. It was part of my birthday present to go out with him for the evening. We went downtown and found an Italian restaurant, that turned out to be the first restaurant there was in this downtown. It really was the cornerstone of the town, you might say. It turned the town from a dirty, empty place, to a thriving city. Anyhow, the owner came over from Italy and started this restaurant. So everything we had was the finest of Italian cooking, including the noodles that he made himself. It was such a fun experience. Then we walked and walked all around. It is the quaintest place, as I have told you before. We just love this downtown. We had such a wonderful time and the evening was very enjoyable.
Today we caught up on laundry (not bad at all now that I have simplified), did some tidying of the house (that has to happen every day around here), the children jumped on the trampoline and played. The boys have been very busy with all kinds of inventions. They are taking 9 volt batteries and making little motors run off of them. I went to Curves at naptime. This afternoon I played the game "memory" with a few of them, and I also read to the girls for a few minutes. S brought home pizza so that was a nice treat.
We are going to try and make our shopping and errands happen all in one day on Wednesday this week. Chiro, WW, Whole Foods, Walmart, then get something to eat and head to prayer meeting. So it will be a BUSY afternoon and evening, but this way it saves gas to not have to make two trips. We will see how it goes. My chiro has backed me down to once a week now and hopes to span it out even further as we go on, so that is good.
E's bday is on Friday. We are going to have some friends over and have a party for her on Sat afternoon. She is very excited. I can hardly believe she will be 6! There are times though, when I watch her that it hits me how grown up she is acting. They are all growing so fast! Today she was looking at herself in the mirror. "I really do look like Mommy!" :)
Well, the children are in bed and it's soon to be mommy and daddy's time to be together---my favorite part of the day! We are going to start putting them down earlier than we have this summer. This way S and I can still have some quiet in the evening and we can also get to bed at a decent time. Plus it's good for the children to start getting prepared for the coming school schedule, which will be here before we know it!
We are doing well here. Last week I mentioned I was simplifying clothing. We have ended up getting rid of so much---it feels really good! AND it has really helped make the laundry managable. I went on and did the girls clothes as well. Then S on Saturday cleaned our closet out (while I was gone, he decided to tackle it, WOW!) That was the last area that had not been done since the move. He also got rid of a bunch of his clothes. We then went through shoes, etc. So we have been on a roll! I still have to go through my clothes in the closet. and S and I need to go through our drawers. It feels good though to get this organized before school starts again soon.
I have to tell you about my date night with my husband. It was part of my birthday present to go out with him for the evening. We went downtown and found an Italian restaurant, that turned out to be the first restaurant there was in this downtown. It really was the cornerstone of the town, you might say. It turned the town from a dirty, empty place, to a thriving city. Anyhow, the owner came over from Italy and started this restaurant. So everything we had was the finest of Italian cooking, including the noodles that he made himself. It was such a fun experience. Then we walked and walked all around. It is the quaintest place, as I have told you before. We just love this downtown. We had such a wonderful time and the evening was very enjoyable.
Today we caught up on laundry (not bad at all now that I have simplified), did some tidying of the house (that has to happen every day around here), the children jumped on the trampoline and played. The boys have been very busy with all kinds of inventions. They are taking 9 volt batteries and making little motors run off of them. I went to Curves at naptime. This afternoon I played the game "memory" with a few of them, and I also read to the girls for a few minutes. S brought home pizza so that was a nice treat.
We are going to try and make our shopping and errands happen all in one day on Wednesday this week. Chiro, WW, Whole Foods, Walmart, then get something to eat and head to prayer meeting. So it will be a BUSY afternoon and evening, but this way it saves gas to not have to make two trips. We will see how it goes. My chiro has backed me down to once a week now and hopes to span it out even further as we go on, so that is good.
E's bday is on Friday. We are going to have some friends over and have a party for her on Sat afternoon. She is very excited. I can hardly believe she will be 6! There are times though, when I watch her that it hits me how grown up she is acting. They are all growing so fast! Today she was looking at herself in the mirror. "I really do look like Mommy!" :)
Well, the children are in bed and it's soon to be mommy and daddy's time to be together---my favorite part of the day! We are going to start putting them down earlier than we have this summer. This way S and I can still have some quiet in the evening and we can also get to bed at a decent time. Plus it's good for the children to start getting prepared for the coming school schedule, which will be here before we know it!
Monday, July 21, 2008
Today has been very, very busy. A friend of mine encouraged me to S-I-M-P-L-I-F-Y in the area of clothing in our house. She was giving me some "large family tips" and getting rid of excess clothes was one of them. We do laundry so much anyway that why keep more than a few sets of clothes for each child. So today I MEGA PURGED! To the tune of 3- 30 gallon trash bags! And I am not quite done yet! But, it feels so good and it is going to be SOO much easier for the children to keep their clothes straight. They have a few play clothes, some church clothes, and some "going to town clothes". Tomorrow I hope to finish it out, and soon S and I want to tackle our own clothes.
I was planning on going to Curves this afternoon, but was on a roll with the purging that we decided it was best to keep going and try and go tomorrow during naps. Then later this afternoon I headed into town with the children and met S. It was our weekly errand night, Chiropractor, Walmart, Chick-fil-a, Whole Foods. It was family night at Chick-Fil-A so the children got to have free icecream with all kinds of toppings. Of course they love that. The Chick-Fil-A mascot cow was there too, and of course they all got a kick out of that. You should see H giving him a high five!
So tonight we are ready to call it a day. Actually, If I had my way, I would kinda like to keep going and finish the clothes. That's how I do, you know. When I get rolling on a project. I want to keep on till it's all done, even if I had to work into the wee hours of the night. But, I will wait now and start at it again in the morning, Lord willing. If you look outside though and see clothes flying everywhere I might be getting carried away....
I was planning on going to Curves this afternoon, but was on a roll with the purging that we decided it was best to keep going and try and go tomorrow during naps. Then later this afternoon I headed into town with the children and met S. It was our weekly errand night, Chiropractor, Walmart, Chick-fil-a, Whole Foods. It was family night at Chick-Fil-A so the children got to have free icecream with all kinds of toppings. Of course they love that. The Chick-Fil-A mascot cow was there too, and of course they all got a kick out of that. You should see H giving him a high five!
So tonight we are ready to call it a day. Actually, If I had my way, I would kinda like to keep going and finish the clothes. That's how I do, you know. When I get rolling on a project. I want to keep on till it's all done, even if I had to work into the wee hours of the night. But, I will wait now and start at it again in the morning, Lord willing. If you look outside though and see clothes flying everywhere I might be getting carried away....
Hello!
Hello to all out there in bloggerville. This is a brief post to let you all know that yes, we are still here, no we have not gotten lost somewhere in the back roads of SC, and yes, all is well.
Last week was very busy with having my dear inlaws here from Arkansas the beginning of the week. Monday and Tuesday were very active fun days of visiting and playing together. Tuesday night we all went out for dinner, where another old friend of S's (they have known each other for 20 years!) and his wife who live now in Pennsylvania also joined the party. After saying our goodbyes to our dear family (we miss them!), we had this couple back to our home for a late night of rich fellowship.
Then this past weekend was our church's communion season. Saturday night was the preparation, and then communion service Lord's Day morning, as well as the regular afternoon service after fellowship lunch. The time was rich indeed and as I told a friend of mine, it truly felt like we went up to the mountain of the Lord. As it says in Isaiah, "Come and let us go up to the mountain of the Lord, to the house of the God of Jacob. And He will teach us His ways, and we will walk in His paths" When Moses went up to the mount and talked with God, his face shown afterwards. We felt so sweetly met yesterday, that it seems as though our countenances should shine throughout this week. I am reminded today though how quickly our souls cleave to the dust and we are reminded of our earthliness. How thankful I am that I have such a sweet Saviour, who loves those pitiful, weak, halting sinners that cleave to Him, and He even looks upon them as lovely.
Last week was very busy with having my dear inlaws here from Arkansas the beginning of the week. Monday and Tuesday were very active fun days of visiting and playing together. Tuesday night we all went out for dinner, where another old friend of S's (they have known each other for 20 years!) and his wife who live now in Pennsylvania also joined the party. After saying our goodbyes to our dear family (we miss them!), we had this couple back to our home for a late night of rich fellowship.
Then this past weekend was our church's communion season. Saturday night was the preparation, and then communion service Lord's Day morning, as well as the regular afternoon service after fellowship lunch. The time was rich indeed and as I told a friend of mine, it truly felt like we went up to the mountain of the Lord. As it says in Isaiah, "Come and let us go up to the mountain of the Lord, to the house of the God of Jacob. And He will teach us His ways, and we will walk in His paths" When Moses went up to the mount and talked with God, his face shown afterwards. We felt so sweetly met yesterday, that it seems as though our countenances should shine throughout this week. I am reminded today though how quickly our souls cleave to the dust and we are reminded of our earthliness. How thankful I am that I have such a sweet Saviour, who loves those pitiful, weak, halting sinners that cleave to Him, and He even looks upon them as lovely.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Lord's Day Gleanings
As I mentioned in a previous post, every Lord's Day in our bulletin our pastor puts a few short quotes or one longer quote for our edification. It is my purpose to post them here each week. I will title these posts "Lord's Day Gleanings". Here was this past week's quote...
"I am tempted to think that I am now an established Christian,--that I have overcome this or that lust so long,-- that I have got into the habit of the opposite grace, --so that there is no fear, I may venture very near the temptation--nearer than other men. This is a lie of Satan. One might as well speak of gunpowder getting by habit of resisting fire, so as not to catch spark. As long as powder is wet, it resists the spark; but when it becomes dry, it is ready to explode at the first touch. As long as the Spirit dwells in my heart, He deadens me to sin, so, if lawfully called through temptation, I may reckon upon God carrying me through. But when the Spirit leaves me, I am like dry gunpowder. Oh for a sense of this!"
By: Robert Murray M'Cheyne (19th centruey Scottish Presbyterian)
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